Personals: Do you want to meet someone?

The other night, I witnessed 3 of my closest friends discuss "dating." All four of us haven't been the most successful in the art of love. We each have our own stories. In reality, our singleness is the result of past disappointments.

While I'm currently off the market (because I'm not "ready"), it caused me to wonder: If I were looking, how would I approach "getting out there?" In my opinion, that's a personal question. Each of us have our own comfort levels. However, let's take "personal" out of this. Let's say, based upon my observations, I have some advice that I could give to my friends (or those that are interested in making a "change.")

Again, I must emphasize this point: You HAVE to be ready to make a change. I believe, based on my own experiences, that each person will reach a point where they say, "You know... I'm ready to make a change. I want my life to be different than what it is now." So, with that understanding, I'm going to approach this from that perspective (and realization).

Here are my tips:

1. Be a joiner! Do you have interests/hobbies? If you have an interest in wine, find a group that meets to taste wines. How about politics? You could find a "young republicans or young democrats" group that meets regularly to discuss issues - especially now that we're in the political season. Guns, golf, gardening, bird watching, museums, book clubs, running groups, etc. Use an interest that you're comfortable with to find a group. At the very least you'll meet new people.

2. Advertise! Tell your friends and family, "Hey... I'm interested in meeting someone. Can you help me out?" Why not? They know you best. Maybe they think you're not ready for takeoff because you haven't discussed this with them yet. Who better to introduce you to friends and coworkers than those that know you best? One of my friends did just that - and within a year, he was dating his future wife.

3. Go Online! Yes, the great frontier these days tends to be the world wide web. However, I know of two people who found their spouses through the online community. Sure, there is E-Harmony and Match, but what about Okcupid and Craig's List (another place to find groups in #1). Heck, you can go online to find out when your local church's Sunday School meets (or small group Bible Study).

4. Get out! Don't stay cooped up in your house or apartment. Take the dog for a walk in a park you've never visited, go biking, fish, eat an afternoon snack on a patio in Uptown by yourself, or go to a bookstore. You're not going to find "the perfect someone" if you don't get out every now and then.

5. Shake things up! Invite every single person you know to a mixer. Ok, this sounds very collegiate, but don't forget how easy it was to meet people in college when you threw a sorority and a fraternity together in the same room. It's the same premise - host a dinner with your single friends and have them invite their own. If you don't meet someone interesting, maybe you'll help another friend in a similar situation?

6. Enjoy the moment! You're single! Don't think of it as a death sentence. Find yourself and be comfortable with your singleness. If you can't learn to be confident in yourself, then how are you going to make it in a relationship? Thrive on your independence, and revel in whatever God may be trying to teach you right now. And the old adage could prove true: When you're comfortable with yourself, and you're not looking, love may just happen to find you!

So these are the tips from "Coach." Finding groups is as easy as going to Google and searching for something in your area. If you're ready, know this: only YOU can change YOU. If you're not, then that's OK. Whether you want to make new friends or a new love, I think some of the above principles can be applied in most situations.

Bottom line: You're perfect because God created you in His image. Be confident in that. And know He wants you to have an abundant life. So whatever you decide, know that you're not alone.

Now get out there and win one for the Gipper!